In Pakistan, a child’s birth is usually a time for celebration, but for too many baby girls, it’s the start of a life marked by neglect or abandonment. The preference for sons is deeply rooted in culture, economics, and tradition, creating a harsh reality where girls are often valued less. Drawing from reports by organizations like the Edhi Foundation, Madadgar 15, and Sahil, and a heartfelt conversation with a woman who grew up feeling unwanted, this post dives into why baby girls are so often overlooked—and what it means for the country.
A Heartbreaking Reality
The Edhi Foundation, a major welfare group in Pakistan, runs a program called Jhoola, where parents can leave unwanted babies in safe cradles. The numbers are hard to stomach. In 2017, they found 355 dead infants in garbage dumps across Pakistan, almost all girls. From January 2017 to April 2018, 345 newborns were discovered abandoned in Karachi’s trash piles, nearly all female. Anwar Kazmi, a manager at Edhi in Karachi, said it made him question if society was slipping backward.
Madadgar 15, an emergency helpline, and Sahil, a group focused on protecting kids, see similar patterns. Sahil’s 2015 report, Cruel Numbers, showed girls face higher risks of abuse and neglect because they’re seen as less valuable. Madadgar gets calls about abandoned babies, mostly girls, often tied to poverty or the pressure to have a son. Why are girls hit hardest? Sons are viewed as future providers who carry the family name and don’t need dowries—a huge expense for daughters in a place where weddings can cost a fortune. Girls, meanwhile, are too often seen as a burden.
One Woman’s Story
I talked to Ayesha*, a 32-year-old teacher from Lahore, who grew up knowing her parents wanted a boy. “I was their third daughter,” she told me, her voice quiet but steady. “My mom once said my dad didn’t talk to her for days after I was born. When my brother came along, everyone threw a party. I was six and felt like I didn’t matter.”
Ayesha’s experience isn’t rare. She remembers little things that added up: her brother got new clothes, she got hand-me-downs; his schooling was a priority, hers wasn’t. “It wasn’t just my family,” she said. “Aunts and uncles would say, ‘Three girls? Try again for a boy.’ It made me feel like I was a mistake.” Ayesha worked hard to prove her worth, but she knows not every girl gets that chance. Some are left in cradles—or worse—because their families can’t face raising them.
What’s Driving This?
The bias against girls comes from a mix of money, culture, and tradition. Dowries are a big factor; even though they’re technically illegal, families can spend millions of rupees marrying off a daughter. That’s a crushing cost when most people earn so little. Culturally, sons are seen as the ones who keep the family name alive and care for parents in old age. Daughters, on the other hand, are expected to join their husband’s family, leaving their own behind.
Sometimes, religious beliefs make things worse. In 2017, Edhi noted that some baby girls in Karachi were abandoned because local clerics called out-of-wedlock babies sinful, and girls paid the price for that stigma. Poverty seals the deal—families who can barely afford to eat prioritize sons who might one day earn a living. Faisal Edhi, whose family runs the foundation, put it bluntly: the wealthy want sons to inherit their name, and the poor want sons to feed them.
A Glimmer of Hope
It’s not all bleak. The Edhi Foundation’s cradles have saved over 20,000 babies since the 1970s, with many adopted or raised in orphanages. Bilquis Edhi, who started the program, faced criticism but kept going, giving countless girls a shot at life. Groups like Sahil and UNICEF Pakistan are trying to change mindsets, too. UNICEF’s 2024-2027 plan focuses on helping girls through school and leadership programs.
Ayesha sees progress in her classroom. “My students, especially the girls, are fierce,” she said. “They dream of jobs, not just weddings. But it’s a slow change. We need boys and men to see girls as equals.”
Moving Forward
To stop this bias, Pakistan needs to tackle its causes: poverty, dowries, and outdated traditions. Programs like India’s Girl Child Protection Scheme could help by covering costs like education, making daughters less of a financial strain. Tougher laws on dowries and better enforcement would make a difference, too. Education campaigns—especially ones that include men and community leaders—can start to shift how people think.
Above all, we need to share stories like Ayesha’s, not just to show the hurt but to honor the strength of girls who rise above it. Every girl born in Pakistan should feel wanted and loved. Until that happens, the cradles will keep filling, and the trash heaps will hide the girls who never got a chance.
*Name changed for privacy.
If you know someone dealing with child abandonment or gender bias, reach out to the Edhi Foundation or Madadgar 15 for help.
Sources:
Edhi Foundation reports on abandoned infants
Sahil’s Cruel Numbers, 2015
UNICEF Pakistan’s 2024-2027 Gender Strategy
Information on dowries and Pakistan’s population trends
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